So today is the 20th of January, which makes it exactly three days before my due date. Although I am not quite overdue, I'm am starting to develop a fear and realization the it could be a possibility. I know I should just be patient because anything can happen in three days, but there's the lingering question I can't seem to stop asking myself; what if? What if she doesn't come before or by then? Will I have to be induced with Pitocin? Will I eventually be forced to get a C-section if labor doesn't progress in time? All these things are going threw my head and I am starting to turn into an anxious mess. I was told that in most cases mothers have their second babies before or around the same time as their first. I had Eden when I was 39 weeks and 2 days, but it seems like Ava is in no rush to make an appearance. If you watched my birth story with Eden, you know that my water broke before I started feeling any contractions. This time around things have been quite the opposite. I keep feeling cramps here and there and my belly tightens more and more frequently, but nothing consistent. This past week has been such a teasing experience. Everyone keeps telling me that I will know when I start going into labor, but will I? What if I'm one of those weird cases that where contractions feel like nothing more then braxton hicks? I know, it's highly unlikely. Honestly, at the end of the day I just want her to be strong and healthy. I have not done much to induce labor besides dancing around and squats and I don't think I will. Even though it is killing me to meet her, I don't want to rush her. I want things to happen as spontaneously and naturally as possible. I will try to stop being so anxious and dramatic and try to relax. Hopefully we get to meet our new addition soon. Please pray for me to relax and to have a safe delivery. Stay beautiful, Dadi |